Crack Burgers

A rich, juicy burger loaded with ranch seasoning, crispy bacon, and melted cheddar cheese.

Why This Recipe Works:

• Cream cheese acts as a thermal barrier, keeping the beef incredibly juicy.
• Mixing ranch seasoning into fat instead of lean meat prevents protein binding issues.
• Pre-cooking the bacon ensures maximum crunch in every single bite.

My first apartment in Chicago had a kitchen so small I could literally touch the refrigerator while standing at the stove, and it was there that I first tried to make a ranch-infused burger for a crowd of skeptical friends.

I ended up setting off the smoke detector twice, but the sheer, messy glory of that first bite made the entire building's evacuation completely worth it.

Most people throw ranch seasoning packet dust straight into ground beef and call it a day, but this rookie mistake dries out the meat. Think about this in terms of physics: the sodium draws out moisture before the patty even hits the griddle, leaving you with a sad, chalky disc.

The simple fix is folding the seasoning into a rich cream cheese and bacon mixture first, which locks in the moisture and creates pockets of molten cheddar throughout the patty.

This technique is hands down the best way to keep things juicy, much like the secret behind our decadent Wisconsin Butter Burger.

Trust me on this.

Crack Burgers

• Publisher Storied Skillet
• Cuisine American
• Category Dinner, Main Course
• Prep Time 15 mins
• Cook Time 10 mins
• Servings 4
• Calories 650 calories
• Rating 4.8 2701
• Tags burger, bacon, cheddar, ranch, dinner

Ingredients

• 1 lb (450g) ground beef (80/20 blend)
• 4 oz cream cheese, softened
• 1 packet (1 oz) dry ranch seasoning mix
• 6 slices bacon, cooked crispy and crumbled
• 1 cup sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
• 4 brioche buns, toasted
• 1 tbsp unsalted butter
• 1 tsp Diamond Crystal kosher salt

Directions

1. In a medium bowl, combine the softened cream cheese, ranch seasoning, crumbled bacon, and shredded cheddar cheese until smooth.
2. Divide the ground beef into 8 thin, equal-sized portions and flatten them into patties.
3. Spoon a generous dollop of the cream cheese mixture onto the center of 4 patties, then top with the remaining 4 patties and pinch the edges firmly to seal.
4. Heat a cast-iron skillet over medium-high heat until smoking, then sear the burgers for 4-5 minutes per side until a deep crust forms.
5. Toast the brioche buns in butter, assemble with your favorite toppings, and serve immediately.

Notes

• I highly recommend using Diamond Crystal kosher salt; if you only have Morton's or fine table salt, cut the measurement in half to avoid an over-salted burger.
• The high fat content of 80/20 ground beef is essential because the fat-soluble flavor compounds in the ranch seasoning need lipids to fully bloom and register on your taste buds.
• Do not press down on the burgers with a spatula while cooking, or you will rupture the cream cheese core and cause a messy blowout in your skillet.
• Leftover cooked patties will firm up significantly in the fridge as the cream cheese solidifies, so reheat them gently in a covered pan with a splash of water to restore their luscious texture.

Serving Suggestions

These loaded burgers are incredibly rich and savory, so pairing them with the right sides makes all the difference. Here are a few of my favorite ways to round out the plate:

• Pair these decadent burgers with a side of crispy Garlic Parmesan Potato Wedges to balance the rich, savory flavors.
• Add a swipe of tangy Smash Burger Sauce to the top bun for an extra layer of zesty contrast.
• Top with homemade Pickled Red Onions to cut through the richness of the cheddar and bacon.
• If you want to double down on the bacon goodness, pair these with our Caramelized Onion Bacon Cheeseburgers toppings for the ultimate feast.

Storage and Reheating

Store leftovers carefully.

Place any leftover cooked patties in an airtight container and keep them in the refrigerator for up to three days. Because of the cream cheese filling, they do not freeze well, as freezing will cause the dairy to separate and turn grainy upon thawing.

To reheat, place the patties in a skillet over medium-low heat with a tablespoon of water. Cover the pan with a lid to trap the steam, which gently warms the cheese core without drying out the beef.

Avoid using the microwave if you can help it. The intense, uneven electromagnetic waves will turn your beautiful beef rubbery and cause the molten cheese center to explode violently across the glass turntable.

Ingredient Substitutes

If you need to make some adjustments based on what is currently in your pantry, here are some easy swaps that work beautifully:

1. Ground Beef: You can swap the 80/20 beef for ground turkey, but make sure to add a tablespoon of olive oil to the mix to compensate for the lower fat content.
2. Cheddar Cheese: Pepper jack or Colby jack make fantastic alternatives if you want a bit of a spicy kick or a milder melt.
3. Cream Cheese: Low-fat cream cheese works in a pinch, though it won't yield quite the same luxurious, velvety mouthfeel as the full-fat version.
4. Brioche Buns: Standard potato rolls or even pretzel buns work beautifully to hold up to the weight of these loaded patties.

At the end of the day, these burgers are all about embracing the messy, joyful side of home cooking with the people you love. Grab a stack of napkins, tap your tongs against your hip, and get ready for the best backyard dinner of the summer.